Moving Forward in Work: The Transformative Experience of Parenthood

Becoming a parent is a transformative experience that changes you in ways like no other. It develops skills, perspective, and intuition that can be powerful tools inside any business. However, the very notion of ‘going back to work’ implies that we are looking backwards, trying to step into place where we have been before, as opposed to being in a new place, moving towards the future. I would even say that becoming a parent is so transformative that it is impossible to go back to where we were. 

Having brought a baby girl into the world ten months ago, I’ve been struggling for a while to reconnect with the world of work. I realise that I’ve been doing this all wrong. We talk about “going back to work”, going back to a particular place; be it a position, level, salary, that we had before. The narrative is that you’re protected and supported as you re-enter, but could this also be what's holding us back? The trouble is, going back to where you were before (metaphorically), isn’t always the most powerful or effective thing that you can do for yourself or for those you serve.

Interestingly, the conversation which is less heard is that such a life-altering experience as becoming a parent leaves you more equipped than before. The way we see the world, the way we tune into emotion, our attention, focus, resourcefulness, efficiency, our ability to think laterally, analytically, and decisively. We develop skills that we thought we had before, but now feel supercharged. The way that we pay attention, the way that we care, the way that we move in the world is different.

Now, let's not pretend this shift is easy. Your days can also be plagued with extreme exhaustion, a crash of confidence and complete decision fatigue accompanied by bouts of imposter syndrome, but what is often left unsaid is that becoming a parent is a transformative experience.

It's therefore no surprise that new parents often feel disconnected with the roles that they held before and with the work environment in which they try to settle back into. Whether it's a question of focus, priority, balance or purpose, the old shoes in which we stood, just don't fit the same.

You operate from a powerful new place.

What if we were able to really leverage the strengths and abilities that we have acquired? This would also need a shift in how businesses operate. What would the world look like if businesses began shining a light on these skills and responsibilities when reintegrating their working parents? What impact would authentic conversations about what could be different have? Imagine if businesses would involve working parents in a dialogue to understand what new skills have surfaced and explore how these could augment the workplace.

I am a big believer in designing the world that we live in. For this reason, I’m taking a moment to ground myself and reconnect with where I am now, what has changed and where I would like to be. 

I won’t be going back to work I’ll be moving forward in work. Moving forward in work means I’ll be stepping into a new space, a new environment, a new way of thinking with an ameliorated mindset, skill-set and perspective. It is about leveraging the benefits of such transformative human experiences, to create stronger businesses.

To all the working parents or anybody with caring responsibilities, I see you, I applaud you, and it's about time the world of business did too.

N:B I must say here, I also acknowledge that becoming a parent is not an easy journey for many, and for some it's a heartbreaking struggle, I know that challenge first hand too and want to stress that although I talk here about becoming a working parent, it's certainly not the only human experience that creates such a shift.

Reimagining the way we work, live and lead.